I haven’t written in so long. It’s been a crazy while. I was admitted to hospital, stayed five days, and then convinced them to dishcharge me because it was too much. I ended up coming out of there with trauma. That’s right, I now have a diagnosis of ptsd on top of my other issues. Trauma is not new to me, but this form of it is. I have uncontrollable shaking anytime an emotion comes up. I’ve also had a med change which has unleashed some intense bpd traits. I have graduated from the antidepressants (they don’t work for me) to the he antipsychotics. Woohoo. I feel like a real crazy person.
As for relationships I’m struggling as I let go of someone who weren’t healthy for each other. I’ve been distanced from some other friends, which is fair I guess I’m a lot to handle. There’s no point to this post. I just needed to write.